"You Only Lose What You Cling To"

3:15 AM

Obsessing over someone or something really has detrimental effects. Not only does it make you desperate and crazy, it takes away basic logic. I noticed that people I was interested in start talking to me when I get over them and stop trying. I think it's because when you cling, everything is held at such a high significance that every observation has polar extremes.

I will never understand girlfriends that check up on their guys, if you are so confident they wouldn't do that. If you had confidence in the relationship he wouldn't run off for someone else. I just find myself laughing at people in relationship turmoil these days. Call me disconcerting but it's unbelievable how quickly "love" turns to 0 attraction or hate. How can people have affairs after having kids and several years of marriage? Even with that much closure clinging can still go wrong.

These days I do feel weightless. I don't need to wait upon another's text and suggestive "forevers". I feel like part of me is over and the remaining is just a layer of calmness that keeps seeping from me. I just don't feel like I did anymore. Even if I'm behind or missing out, it doesn't feel lack because I accepted lack is my best friend at this point. Lack is a defense against aimless clinging and wishful thinking, not saying life is a let down. It's the opposite! But I will never find myself in certain things again that will just force upon me extra baggage and weigh me down. Lack gives me the dignity and logic I deserve and the patient reminder to get through every desire at clinging than losing.









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