5 Life Lessons I Learned So Far

By Cathy H - 2:02 AM

I been thinking about some things reflecting on all the people,events and place I been to and figured I just want to sum some of them up:

1. The world isn't going to stop for anybody
 It doesn't matter if you're a billionaire about to purchase a yacht, you are getting married to the love of your life, doesn't matter if you've spent a year crying in your room over how much of a mess your life is. You are insignificant among the world, in my criminology class my professor wrote a piece on integrating people contemplating suicide to being in nature and just watching how a river flows. Because there is so many elements in life that is continuously at work and moving forward, to understand you are nothing in this world means you are everything. Sure it's sad your boyfriend broke up with you, you aren't at the place you want to be, the list goes on. But the world isn't going to stop and cry along with you until you feel better and ready to move on. I feel the reason why some people feel self pity is because it sort of puts them in a comfort spot that they won't need to do anything about it since the world has wronged them in some way. The world doesn't wrong anyone purposefully.  Especially not in first world countries because it's hard to even imagine what people go through in poverty stricken countries conflict zones like Liberia and Syria. Not doing a whole "be happy because an African child is starving" lecture but honestly, if there is 3 meals on your plate and you are sleeping under a roof you should at least be 80% grateful for life. When I felt down in the past I just pretended I was another happy go lucky person enjoying life until I actually became this person. Life is not replaying so stop wasting time and live it out!

2. Relationships aren't a life savior
 Getting into a relationship isn't going to solve every life problem and propel you into a fantasy world of romance. All my friends when I congratulate them on their relationship say " what's so good about it, so much fighting and work, its so tiring." I'm not saying I don't want one because every human has the biological instinct to find a mate. But if you're not sure who you are as a person it's going to make you feel worse than better, more insecure than secure and bring many doubts on. Marriage at that is just a piece of paper. I think society puts many concepts on love from wedding rings and ceremonies to honeymoons and marriage certificate. It's just there to make us feel secure that they won't easily leave us. But if it every falls apart, many people get too devastated and lose their dignity. Find yourself before all else!

3. Live for NOW
I cant even count how many times in the past I've been constantly tortured by past and future. I love this quote because it just summarizes how silly we are to let "problems" worry us to death:
I thought of this point walking to the dock while taking this picture today:

I sat at this point and looked out into the ocean like this and thought how good it feels to let go of thinking and be fascinated by nature. I thought of all the days leading up to this point and that even if everyone leaves me I always have myself. I have myself to think and do what I want and to get through everything. As long as I have myself the future doesn't seem that daunting because material things and people will leave. Past mistakes and memories will eventually fade but I always think to myself "do I have a problem with anything NOW" Not 3 months after if I'm going to get into a class I need or a job I want, not 5 years down the road if I'll marry or not, but this minute. The answer is always no, because I am perfectly fine now. If you let your mind trick you into fretting over thousands of thoughts life is going to get exhausting. Take it literally one minute at a time and this is how to find clarity and happiness.

4. Popularity is not going to make life perfect
first of all, no one has 1,000 friends in real life like on Facebook. Things like getting likes and alot of people hitting on you is good for temporary. Taking clubbing pictures and getting kissed by random people is nice self validation but not in the long term for self confidence. In this world, everything is impermanent and whatever short term validation you had from others will eventually leave you craving for more. I am going to use a Murakami quote to sum up my thoughts:

I personally think all we need in life is a few CLOSE friends, the rest don't really matter. I used to work really hard at keeping in touch and making sure we kept our friendship even thought they were flaky and not what I truly liked. I never had the courage to realize I was keeping these people in my life for the sake of increasing friends. Now I want people that can make me positive as a person even if it's just 1 person, which I do have one best friend I see everyday. Building close relationships beats having 30 people like your pictures on Facebook!

5. Take as many chances and experience as much as possible
 Nobody remembers the nights they stayed home and got plenty of sleep! Sometimes the most amazing things happen when it's spontaneous. I have some friends that need to plan every single details and it is mentally draining. Sometimes going with the flow gives the best results. I truly believe this is the way to never getting bored in life, never stay in your home and sulk all day. This week alone I been out of the country and back, baked cinnamon buns and doing Insanity workout at 2am, met the cutest half korean half white little girl than went downtown for a 3 hour dining of craziness, went out despite monsoon weather rain to Italian day. My point is, who is stopping you from living at random, just do what you want and be open because it makes you smile at the end :) The more you stay alone in your thoughts the more you think, the more you over think and if you are depressed over something the more depressed you feel. Meet new people and try new foods and new activities, take alot of pictures for memories, make a fool of yourself and you will look back and be glad you did it. Things are happening whether you are there or not, and if you want something. Make it happen! I really think I made everything happen I wanted so far in life whether it was for good reasons or not and glad I experienced it. You may never be truly ready, now is the chance!

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  1. Thnaks for sharing this post with all of us. I found this post veyr informative for me. Also check out my article on how to find clarity in love life.