CATHY HUANG

My time in Korea is slowly coming to an end, and I have extremely mixed feelings about everything. I have never experienced a time when I have created an completely different life for myself away from home, and have made friends to accompany me throughout this journey. And I realized, why it is so hard to say goodbye to this country. It is in the little things that have an impact on me. It's not about the grandiose trips or highlights, but rather in the day-to-day low lights that have created these bonds and memories with everyone around me. It's in the routine. It's going out to tiny eateries with friends in our small town, staying up late to play cards against humanities, trying to put something together for every single holiday despite our lack of resources abroad. It's the kindness that has been shown to me from once strangers that have become some of the best friends I could ask for. I cannot say any of this without being sentimental, because to me it is not something as simple as moving back home. It is leaving an entire life behind and going back to the life I had before. I remember the first entry I wrote when I first started teaching, talked about how adapting is a team effort with the aid of many people. From my mentor teacher that helps me prepare documents, to the lunch lady that drives me home after work, to the coordinators that have allowed me to travel around the country. And to my parents that have given me advice and financial support in the midst of all of this for every problem I have. 

I knew beforehand from going on extensive trips that it is hard to say goodbye, and dealing with the post trip blues are harder. But, how can I begin to process the effect of leaving a year's worth of friendships, travel experiences, and memories behind? The thought of literally leaving just makes me feel uneasy. I will miss my beloved Daegu city so much. I've memorized downtown like the back of my hands, from the shopping, restaurants, and weekly Korean classes with friends.  Busan, where it all began with its beaches and dog cafes. But yet, I know that it is time for me to move on. It is not a permanent life.  This year has been too good to me, too comfortable. It makes me think of coincidences and whether they exist or not. Because coming here, who knows how this year turned out? Without coming here, I would not be traveling to 5 countries within 12 months, reaching fluency in Korean, met these special people, and learned more about myself. I think I was meant to be here. For me, I get attached to the smallest things about places like riding the train, going to that weekly cafe for studying sessions, and going in school everyday to prepare for my lessons. Again, its really the little things. Nothing extravagant. I am extremely fortunate to have a good year, sometimes I wonder if I deserved this? At this point, though I know I'll become extremely nostalgic of my time here I am at the same time very grateful and ready to leave and let go. This year taught me to trust in fate, that no matter how hard I struggle and worry and think how I want my life to go- life will handle itself and will lead me the right way. It's hard to trust that everything turns out in the end, but it really does. Life has never failed to show me more and more reasons for living. And I feel very blessed for that. 

I finally visited the well known Gyeongbokgung palace last weekend!! Unfortunately, I only visited for one minute because it closed at 5pm. I was able to capture a few pictures, and than walked around with my friends to see a beautiful Christmas lights exhibition before making our way to Insadong for some Indian food. To finish off the day, we watched an amazing arts and mime show called "PAINTERS: HERO" by 4 very talented Korean men. They drew intricate, beautiful art on stage and integrated it into their act.  Seoul is always a beautiful place with so much to do!

I attended a national farewell for our teaching program last weekend for 2 nights 3 days that took us to tourist places all over Seoul and gave us a chance to have a reunion with friends with met at orientation and socialize with them because we were all placed in different provinces. Me and my bestie were obviously roommates and I was so happy to see all my friends again. The 5 star hotel we stayed in was in the centre of Gangnam and super fancy with many christmas decorations, European styled furnishings and I loved the buffets they served as well. I cannot believe my time in Korea is coming to an end next month. 

On a sunny and slightly chilly Saturday on December 12th, I crossed off my of my lifetime bucket lists- visiting the border between North and South Korea. This trip was extremely meaningful to me because I have done years of extensive research, watched many North Korean documentaries, and have followed the human rights issues there for an extended period of time. It always baffled me everytime I thought of the technological advancement South Korea has made with metropolitan infrastructures and economic success compared with the dismal realities North Koreans face by facing mass starvation, no electricity, and subjected to concentration camps. Therefore, visiting the DMZ was the closest thing I could get to experiencing this divided reality between the North and South. 

There are many organized tour companies in South Korea that take visitors to DMZ such as "Enjoy Korea Tours" or the DMZ train offered by KORAIL.  I went there as part of a national educational program event.  The drive up from Seoul is approximately one hour and a soldier checked everyone's ARC ID cards on the bus before we were allowed in the area. The first stop was a North Korean gift shop that sold everything from North Korean soju to little pins and DMZ shirts.  Than, we were off to the Dorasan train station which was stated as "not the last train station from the South, but the first train towards to North" that connects Seoul to Pyongyang, the capital of North Korea.  You can buy more DMZ souvenirs, and buy a 500 won ticket to see the Dorasan train tracks for some quick pictures. It was quite surreal taking a picture with the "train to Pyongyang" sign because its a reminder that reunification for North and South is so close, but yet so far. Next came my favorite part, which was the Dorason observatory which had a bunch of paid binoculars that enable visitors to see into North Korea. 

It was a very somber yet fascinating experience standing right there and trying to find the Kim-Il Sung statue and looking at the "factories" there which basically served as a propaganda village with no people. Obviously, the real situation of the North Korean people cannot be seen.  Again, "so close...yet so far" is the feeling that followed me throughout this whole tour.  Our last stop was to the 3rd infiltration tunnel, discovered by Korean forces in 1987. We got to see a brief video at the DMZ video room, take pictures with various symbolic sculptures, and finally walk down the tunnel. No photographing devices were allowed and we wore helmets. Who knew 200 m walk down would be so difficult? Tall people had the hardest time as they tried to refrain from hitting their head on the low cave ceilings. I believe that going in the tunnel is an experience in itself, and quite the uphill workout going back up! At the end of our tour, an Korean soldier once again checked everyone's ID cards before the buses were allowed to drive out of the DMZ zone. I would strongly recommend anyone with interest in the North Korean situation or history to do the DMZ tour. Since travel to North Korea is expensive and difficult, the DMZ is a easier alternative to learn more about the history of war,conflict, and reunification hopes for the North and South one day.