Life is Fleeting: Nowhere To Go, Nothing To Be

7:18 PM



I remember hearing one of Ajahn Brahm's talk "being nobody, going no where" at  the beginning of the year. I vaguely grasped what he meant but still didn't understand why he suggested against achieving goals with tenacity. Now I reflect back, in the past and reflect in the future I already know that no moment is EVER going to be perfect. When I was younger,  I thought if I got to a certain point, a certain place, I can finally stop struggling and enjoy the present. But everything comes with mundanity, even if I were to move to Dubai and make that my home- I'd inevitably start getting suffocated by surroundings. It's not the geographic location, the wealth, the people around me. It will ALL get old. It will ALL pass. And that's what terrifies me the most. To adjust and make that a "normal" no what where I end up in life. I have achieved almost everything I have set out to, or dreamt of accomplishing if I were my 13 year old self today. In fact, I have been dealt a very easy life.  But that's not the point. I realized that at any given moment, an moment of unfulfilled will hit and leave me striving towards something else. But I'm not a hamster on the running wheel. I refuse to be caught up in this cycle, wondering why nothing ever feels 100% perfect.

Because we are consumed by the trivialities of everyday, from the person that cut us off, the traffic jam, the 9-5 weekdays, the misunderstandings.  But looking at the sky, one has to realize that we in  fact do not get a forever. Does that bring any kind of anxiety? To me it doesn't. Death marks the end of suffering, of being eaten up by every insignificant thought, the end of endless wanting and wishing for more and more. What I'm afraid of is eternal return,  neverending consciousness in my own mind, reliving life over and over. We can distract this fact by working towards our career, finding that perfect someone, buying material things. But we are all on a train to one destination - the end of life, nothingness. I guess the question I've being pondering my whole life is realized to nihilism and existentalism- if we only get a limited time, and we are so consciousness of that- what's the point of anything? But now I just take it as it is, day by day, month by month, year by year. If there's no point of anything, why not just enjoy it? Let it play out, enjoy the new people I meet, the realizations I come to, the new places to be travelled. It's one way or the other. One day we do not get the see the sky, that hit me hard.

 Life is a death sentence and we do not know when the execution time is. So why does everyone pretend like there is a forever with anything? We are not immortal, heroic beings. Our legacy, at best is remembered for a few years, by a few people.  Everything is fleeting. There is nowhere to go at the end, and nothing to be.


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1 comments

  1. Can you prove that life is fleeting. Can you disprove the statement "Life is inteminable". Are different stages of life fleeting or interminable? Is your concept of time the same as mine?

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